How to Deal with Trolls: A Step-by-Step Guide
You've seen one troll, you've seen them all... and YET, when they creep into our comments sections, we lose our minds.
This has a debilitating impact on our creative productivity as well as our emotional peace, which is why I have created this handy dandy (a la Steve from Blues Clues) guide for how to deal with them.
Step 1: Take a Fucking BREATH
Did you feel all of the air leave your lungs as you read that nasty comment? Well, that air needs replacing, so slow yourself down and breathe. Walk away for a moment if you need to, but actually stop what you're doing and take a few deep breaths. Don't skip this step, you should be able to HEAR your breathing for it to count.
Step 2: Consider the Source
Many so-called "Trolls" fall into one of two categories: bots and hurt people. Bot accounts are responsible for some percentage of shitty comments that I have not researched or looked up statistical data on, but it for SURE exists, and it's utterly ridiculous to get upset about what a robot says to you. Bot accounts are fairly easy to spot, so take a look and see if you can spot the bot.
Alternatively, your "troll" may be a hurt person. This is someone who has not done their healing work and is allowing their pain to become YOUR problem. "Hurt people hurt people" as the saying goes.
Melissa Helwig (a Spotlight Series member) experienced both of these in the span of a few days. We helped her spot the bot right away, and we also scoped out another troll of hers and saw that it was a person dealing with severe depression, who took it out on Melissa and her candles because she was having a bad day.
I have been posting content on the internet since 2006 and I can tell you that 99.9% of my trolls have fallen into one of these categories. Either way, they shouldn't be dictating how we live our lives, and CERTAINLY should not stop us from creative pursuits
Step 3: Delete/Respond and Move on
Maybe you just don't feel like engaging today. That's fine. That's what the delete button is for. It may also be what the "Remove Follower" button is for :) Blocking is the nuclear option, and I suspect you already know when to use it.
If responding, see if you can use it as a chance to create content. Meaning, if you were to screenshot your reply and put it in your story, what message would you want it to give your audience? What could you train them in, about you? Reverse engineer your reply by first considering what you want the overall impact of the screenshot to be. For example, it could be an opportunity to display your sense of humor, your kindness, your snark :)
And then... we simply move on. Remember, every minute in your head you give to a troll is a minute you steal from yourself.
In the comments below, tell me a story about a troll you've gotten and how you dealt with it!